I need to talk to you about an important matter involving lesbians.
No, we ended up finding him drunk at a bus stop downtown sitting on the bench asking people for chocolates and amazing stories to "rid his mind of his whore of a girlfriend"
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
This is part your fault too. Don't tell me your dishes are unbreakable and not expect me to prove you wrong.
now that you've tased me I refuse to buy you flowers
I'm assuming the reason my elbow is so sore has something to do with all the broken shot glasses eh?
Yep
my grandma just gave me a shoebox fulled to the top with tootsie rolls and condoms with a not that said "enjoy college, find a big cock" i'm not sure how I feel about this
I haven't taken a solid shit in four weeks. Do you know what started four weeks ago? Alcohol and dining hall food. Fucking college.
someone just got arrested on campus...
holy fuck look at all that cocaine
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
Remember earlier when I was excited about finding that birth control pill in my purse? Definitely acid.
For not being a nurse or a sex worker I have seen an alarming amount of penises.
I've never sung with balls in my mouth
Randomize
