Ps if we're still living vicariously through each other, you had sex on a beach last night
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
All I remember is you introducing yourself to the entire basketball team using the line "I'll show you a slam dunk."
And I'm ok with his balls touching my ass
Dude, had to, it's Canada Day, I fucked her for Canada. Seriously, I put my Canadian flag on my bed and fucked her on it.
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
Would you and/or him be willing to dress up like the phantom, sing me music of the night and then bone the shit out of me? this is important.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Why would you waste your Ritalin on your children?
I found where he bartends and I guarantee you that in approximately nine months from this Friday, you will have a niece
If we're going to communicate going forward, you'll need to be versed in Gillian Anderson.
Do not tell me I cant do drunk math ever again, AND I made a creative way of telling him I want him to fuck me.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
Randomize
