I gotta feeling the economic climate has killed the housewife market
I dont know whether to be proud of myself for not driving, or being proud that i was so messed up I couldnt drive
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
you just used a box of cheese-its to get into the bar
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
I would do laundry with you but I vaguely remember swallowing all my quarters last night as some kind of trick.
can we get together and have a vodka water gun fight? i need to get som intense excersise/alcohol
Its a good night to get drunk in my onesie.
shit went down at the bar when this girl with 'morals' totally cock blocked a married guy. she actually kicked IN the bathroom door when they were fucking in there. then we all did shots.
You'll have to pretend I'm texting you with buddychecks.
Like the Jimeny Cricket of cockblocks.
Dude they're making a condom for people who have no feeling in their penises that will make them able to have an orgasm. I love science
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
WHERE THE FUCK AM I? AND WHO PUT DUCK TAPE ON MY NIPPLES! MY NIPPLES!!!!!!
Wait til you see what we did to Dave. Hairy bastard will never be the same
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Randomize
