$1 pitcher night should be outlawed.
not exactly restoring sanity, but he is throwing up on the national mall right now
we need to drink more beer. the fridge wont close.
I just had to tell her that no she really doesnt need to sneak pizza from mcmurrays out in a plastic bag for me later
Oh, and she's that dumb bitch that goes out in public in full make up and sweats with uggs. I hope she falls face first in a bowl of queso and drowns
Oh man. Realized I was high when I realized how long I'd been watching Roseanne
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
I suppose I should wish you a happy one year of bumping uglies
Cause its not a drunken adventure unless someone ends up in a pool
Well we had to pull over on a side street in town so I could throw up while moms were driving by with car loads of kids, I feel like I just performed a lil silent AA film for the childrens
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
I have a hook up buddy in Abiquiu. He lives next to a Chipotle; that's the only reason I see him.
Just found the measuring tape in my bathroom. How drunk could I have possibly been on Saturday?!
Fall is here I will miss walking downtown in nothing but paint and pasties
After finding out he was married when we were together, I don't trust him.
Randomize
