whats up tonight?
Ice cream, wine, and teabags... Not the earl grey kind
I'm in a strip club that reminds me of a crack house from the 80's.
I climb out of my sunroof. I mean its kind of embarrassing but part of me feels awesome and ninja like.
I feel like shaving is just admitting i'm gonna do him, even though im still on the fence
shave. it'll take 10 min. Better safe than hairy.
No fucking idea. Just paid for my chipotle in chocolate coins, though. Either there is a huge language barrier happening here, or my big boobs are finally paying off.
we are torturing ourselves with these mediocre cocks
we cut her off and put her in bed but by the time we got back to the drinks she was already there shirtless. she's the topless tequila ninja
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I think i morst likely have 95 %patulas for hands and probably i also went to eGypt with so manyfriends. We laids in the sarcaphoguses.
You sound pretty unsure about all of this.
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
I didn't realize how drunk I was until my vagina was in the snow.
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
He took a girl home at like eight, fucked her, kicked her out, came back to the bar, and repeated the process again at 10:30 and 2:30. THREE GIRLS IN ONE NIGHT. ALL PICKUPS. I HATE HIM.
I was really surprised he asked for my number the next morning..... and my name.
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