do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
He asked us to wake him up with a strobe light. We had it going in front of his face full power for half and hour and he didn't even blink.
Btw I'm currently writing a paper in a beer garden. Be proud.
His mom already thought we were lesbians BODY SHOTS WERE JUST NOT AN OPTION SORRY
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
Dude, if I don't end up wearing a banana suit in Milwaukee, I will consider that trip a complete failure.
The worst part was when I went to go spit it out and rinse my mouth, his grandpa was in the bathroom, so I had to fucking wait. It was awful. I finally ran to the kitchen and prayed his parents didn't come out of their room.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
i was so high when i left this morning that rather than make sandwiches i threw bread and peanut butter in my backpack. a whole loaf. and a whole jar
There's a big difference between a penis and a toilet.
what happened last night?!
you took a shot and then laid down on our kitchen table and passed out.. then when we tried to move you to the couch you screamed "no! i love tables"
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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