she is the female version of PC from the mac and pc commercials..i'll still hit tho
Just realized my talking to the tv hockey voice is same as my sex voice. Life just got a whole lot weirder.
I meant to thank you again for giving up a potential interracial threesome to come to my party. I'm glad you stayed!
she stopped traffic so I could crutch across the street. Clubbing while crippled and drunk is different.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
I woke up this morning to find a stuffed animal submerged in the toilet. I'm not entirely sure if it was the cat or Kara.
Most desperate stoner moment; dropped our hard earned resin ball in the sand, rinsed it off and then did knife hits in the kitchen cuz we broke our only pipe
After what I experienced at 6am this morning, all I can say is chew your noodles thoroughly.
Just got stuck in an elevator on campus with a ton of British guys. My pants almost pulled themselves down.
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
Cheers to being single today. There's an entire box of franzia with my name on it.
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
let me wake up, find my pants, and find out where i am tommorow and ill get back to you on that
I'm literally trapped as the little spoon on a mattress on the floor of an unfinished basement with a professional athlete snoring in my hair
Its official, kitchen-couch is my favorite.
You passed out again didn't you?
its likely that this occurred.
Randomize
