Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
last night was a success...if success means i don't remember the guy's name and my panties are somewhere in the parking lot behind the bar
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
My date keeps hitting on your friend. Had no expectations, but not a real confidence booster.
I won't drink with you again until you promise to not feed me anymore paper bags
Doing the walk of shame and bringing my dad a newspaper en route. Favourite daughter status confirmed.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
just pleasured myself to USA hockey beating Russia in the shoot out. god bless America.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
It feels so wrong having a picture of my tits next to a picture of my daughter.
Okay, since we're going to be living together and I'm obviously better than you at everything, I have one single simple rule that I want you to follow: DO. NOT. FUCK WITH ME.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
The cat just brought me a bottle opener. I think she's my soulmate.
I'd ask how but then you'd tell me.
I called him my big strong man today. It's all downhill from here. Matching Christmas sweaters, here we come
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