come downstairs quick. our boyfriends are having a dance off in nothing but their underwear and shoes. and they have semis too.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
No gym. Sooooo hung over. Just puked up the water I drank and it still has ice cubes in it.
Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
just got double teamed by two guys I will be on beach patrol with this summer. six months until the season starts and I'm already 'that girl.'
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
I remember desperately screaming that I love my life and running in zig zags all the way home
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
Math equation of the day: 4 waffles + 1 bowl of weed = 1 terrific nap
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Don't be the guy that has his dick out at work.
Sean just lit a cig with his taser..... I am in awe
You like pics of my balls that much?
I am at the store looking at frames as we text...
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize