Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
She was so bad on top that i found myself watching a TV that wasn't even turned on
He was carrying a rolled up carpet saying he was saving it for tomorrow's Walk of Fame.
Its against the rules to not make you aware of his virgin situation prior to penetration
Pre warning. Your not gonna sleep tonight cuz I'm staying with your roommate. Thanks for breaking up with me.
This guy either needs to stop touching me or buy me another drink.
But I was triple fisting doubles, that's bound to be a good time. Might have a broken collarbone though.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
I can not say for certain that I did not blow someone in the bathroom at the bar at some point.
I told my coworker that I'd get him some edibles because he wants to rekindle his marriage. I'd better get some good karma out of this.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
For future reference, when he drunkenly screams "YOUR MOTHER SUCKS COCKS IN HELL," he means that he's about to throw up. Invest in a bucket.
What is it in my brain that makes me look at a penis and think "that belongs in my mouth"?
i doubt you are even in possession of a crowbar.
I suggest you not find out the hard way
found a note from drunk me saying "don't worry i fed the mice". WHAT MICE?
Randomize