So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
i know, but like... i wanna be a CLASSY i'm-stealing-your-date kind of slutty...
just got my girl scout cookies. wanna get high?
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
nothing worse than walking out of class after 3 hours and having covered exactly zero information
walking out with herpes. that would be worse
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
Every bar we ever go to has a woman there who hates him. Getting so much vagina has never seemed so not glorious
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
I have to take a quiz before midnight. Trying to decided if its a better idea to take it now when I'm stoned or later when I'm drunk.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
Ended up at the strip club, got told I should be a dancer 4 times, got free tacos and my hot TA slide in the dms. How was your night?
There comes a point where there's just condoms and old mcdonalds in your garbage can and you can't tell if you've won or lost.
He is a beautiful butterfly covered in tattoos and naked.
Randomize
