She is in my trunk
wtf someone played my fucking brickbreaker games and lost i had ten fucking lives. ughhh
maybe you did when you were drunk
no way, i wasn't THAT drunk.
Alli causes anal leakage. You can find someone to like you if you are fat but no one will like you if you poop yourself.
I want you more than these girls want KFC
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
Ok lesson learned. Don't lick the spoon when making mushroom chocolates. The kitchen walls are melting.
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
My roommate threw his shoe through our window and I came out of my blackout kicking holes in my wall. Pretty sure Edward 80 Hands won't be happening anymore.
I just puked my brains out on the side of the road (see picture) And I took a picture for our scrapbook! I am always thinking! =) tell me your proud?!
I fcuked ip.
Is this your way of telling me that you got drunk in your office before meeting with your dissertation advisor again? Or that you finally banged that freshman fraternity pledge?
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
Sorry about the weird guinea pigs text. I was drunk and they were freaking me out
actually there are like 49038098 people in the bathroom for no reason. Singing My Heart Will Go On and pseudo fighting.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
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