Stars make me really horny. Especially that shiny one its just staring at me.
Stop being a whore!!! Everyone can see!!!!
Deffinety need to stop having sex on the beach just took a dump and it was mostly sand
the sex was "jacking off to playboy" bad.
I distinctly recall there being a "I can't be dead 2maro" stipulation to going out last night. There's been a breech of contract
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
Finding out he was uncircumcised by feeling his foreskin in my mouth was NOT ideal. New rule. Lights ALWAYS on.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
I think I caught your cold through my vagina. It was worth it.
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I'm sending him pics of me in my new lingerie telling him to come over and when he gets here I'll have changed into like sweats and a 5 year old shirt with ketchup stains on it
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
How proud should I be that I googled "dildo with wheels" and actually got the result I wanted?
Your boobs are like a folk legend.
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
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