Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I woke up at 2 in my clothes with a defrosted steak in my pocket, no drinky this week at all.
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
Do you remember anything yesterday that led to needing a cup of couscous in my closet?
Can u please come get me. My car keys are gone. Somehow I ended up sleeping in my trunk
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
I just found out that I slept with Kate Gosselin's publicist back in June . Brb I have to wash myself endlessly.
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
That would be a mascot riding an ATV at a semi-professional hockey game, if that doesn't sum up how I've been I don't know what could
We probably shouldn't have humped each other in a stairwell for an hour. that was probably my bad
It's wednesday. OF COURSE HE'S DRUNK.
I was so high I kept trying to flush the toilet with the light switch
I have filthy fantasies involving his tongue. My vagina almost exploded while he was licking that ice cream cone.
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