i told him that if he starts being sappy its friends = off. he called me jerkface and drew on me w permanent marker. im either in love w him or we are twelve.
you'll never believe how fucking awesome rain man is when you're stoned.
We were busted for public indecency in the back of my car in the parking lot. This time we were just reading my Cosmo magazine.
i just heard someone have an orgasm and then throw up through the vent in my room.
We stayed in and smoked weed and watched Dreamgirls. We made each other's vaginal lips sing the songs. Mine was Beyonce, hers was Jamie Foxx. I think this is one of those times you're jealous you're not an awesome lesbian.
He kept insisting that I was going to have an orgasm but it just felt like he was rubbing sand paper on my vagina
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
She was lying on the table chugging back something when the table broke
She kept going
You guys had reggaeton music playing while dry humping? Definition of romance.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
Remember that guy I fucked last month? Well I'm watching his dog this weekend while he's in the Bahamas with his girlfriend. What is my life
He showed up at my house drunk with a pizza and said he wanted to lazily finger me while I watched supernatural. Who was I to say no?
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
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