Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
Yeah. I woke up naked in his bed this morning and remember saying "Get a condom cuz I can't afford an abortion right now" last night. He didn't run. He's a keeper
Hey i just realized that im masturbating in the exact same kind of chair that they are doing it on in this porno
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Ahhh November 1st. National Untagging Day
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
Fuck edible panties there is a dress made out of bacon
Hearing them have a conversation is like listening to water buffalo have sex. Awkward and scarring.
I started screaming "MY PARENTS ARE MORMON" at a stranger and promptly proceeded to run into a wall. How do you think it went?
The power of the half flaccid cock, and to think, I thought I was just playing accordion in front of her Vagina!
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Randomize
