so she proceeds to puke everywhere, look up at me like a sick dog, and then say, "i'll finish if you want me to."
Hot guy, man whore rep, huge crush, alcohol that will fuck you up. I fail to see how this could go wrong
i was taking the test and had to adjust my boner and my teacher thought i was cheating or something
Just had to explain to the nurse WHERE I have poison ivy. Great Day
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
I need to sleep with 3 more guys by midnight to meet my 2010 resolution..
Couldn't get it up. She asked me what she was doing wrong. Didn't have the heart to tell her. I appreciated her willingness to adapt, but she's pretty much gonna look that bad her whole life.
Text me when you wake up so I know you're ok. It's really worrisome to get home at this hour and find 3 men passed out in my room but no you. Love you, goodnight. :-)
I'm so in the Halloween spirit, I zombified my all of my nudes on my phone. Tell me this isn't creative.
Did we almost burn down the bar last night? I guess flaming shots were a bad idea.
I feel like my nipples were chewed on by alligators.
Just figured out my hair is long enough to tie my wrists together. . .get over here NOW!
I think we have some hyper-understanding of each other when drunk, because looking back at our text convo from last night, they were literally just jumbled letters.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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