I wanna wear you like a flannel shirt
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
you definitely have a few illegitimate kids
probs. Not too worried about it though. MOst girls are too embarrassed that they let me into their pants that they'll never admit its mine
Ive been sitting around naked watching magic on youtube.
Well apparently "don't come inside of me" wasn't one of the English phrases he understood! On the bright side... At least he will get his green card for having an american kid!
shes still here... layin in my bed watching a beyonce concert on tv drinking leftover franzia straight outta the bag and crying
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
I just found that video of you jumping onto my exercise ball feet-first and face-planting into my shoe rack.
just had sex on top of a camper looking at the stars, BEAT THAT.
So we played the stone cold theme song and continued to chug 2 beers at once and everyone just looked in shock
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
My date ended with her leaving the bar with that guy who used to jerk off in the back of the school bus.
I need an honest answer, no judgements. Would it make me a bad person if I fucked the other twin?
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
IDK if she's gay or not, but there is something about the way she looks at me that says "do dirty dirty things to me." I have no choice but to oblige.
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