I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
Well I think that's a good thing that I'm not full of someone else.
Nicole wore just a belt and her pedometer and hopped on top of me last night. She "walked" 822 steps before we finished.
New charity walk idea!
just served this dwarf dude an entire pitcher of malt liquor. watching this will totally be worth my bartender's certification.
He made fire alarm noises before throwing up all over the street.
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
Just realized I have to keep sleeping with him... those scars from drunk sex on the 4th of July are still on my back and lord knows I'm not about to explain that to another guy.
its friday night, im aone in my apartment and eating 2 year expired canned fruit, naked. i'm not single or anything..
You guys don't happened to be dressed as gladiators, do you?
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
Someone needs to lock me in a chastity belt because all my vagina does is get me into trouble. Fuck.
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
Still can’t get over the fact that we ate beef jerky off a strip club floor
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