Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(502): View more from Kentucky

sometimes in life you just needs hand puppets

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(714): View more from California

we used that portable toilet as a cooler to keep coronas. next person who tells me hospitals arn't fun needs to come party in rm 180.

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(410): View more from Maryland

she burped and cried multiple times. it was like i was getting head from a baby.

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(330): View more from Ohio

mom just called and i was mid bong hit but i answered anyways coughing and sounding rough she the apologized for waking her little angel up. its 2PM

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(443): View more from Maryland

Elton John & Lady Gaga just did a duet on the Grammies. How appropriate. He likes cock & she happens to have one.

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(860): View more from Connecticut

his recent searches consisted of "World record for not bathing" and "Miley Cyrus vs Taylor Swift". Not even i am that desperate.

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(713): View more from Texas

Do you want the really bad news or the bad news? Or do you want it in chronological order?

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(516): View more from New York

I mean I puked all over three separate towns last night and I still think you're the one who should reevaluate their life.

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(509): View more from Washington

YOU UNCULTURED BADGER

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