Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
ya and he came three minutes into it because he didnt have sex all summer
oh that makes more sense i knew you arent that good
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
I don't think the TSA agent thought getting iced while searching my bag was as funny as I did.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
So are you still down for me to come stay with you and just have sex on vicodin all weekend?
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I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
hey if you're going to the hospital do you wanna pick me up a taco on your way back
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I'm slacking. We've been hooking up for months and I have yet to bang him while he's wearing the clown mask.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
I just thought you should know that you should be proud of your dick. It's pretty much perfect. Just, ya know, by the way.
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