Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
you don't remember? you called me at 330 crying because you were in the middle of having sex with corey and forgot his name. all you kept saying was i'm a drunk bitch.
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
i've already watched her fall off the steps, walk up on our porch and try to dance with the dog, and stumble across the street to stand outside the neighbors window...is it taking it too far to watch this rando girl and some guy have sex behind our parking lot now?
i'm pretty sure i lost all sex appeal when he caught me peeing in his bushes
Hairspray is covering 85% of my body. Help.
Wait until you see the roof.
Everytime the frat boy touches his bro's ass after making a cup take a drink
Oh god. Standing was a rash decision
I made it to Starbucks to do work and I've just been sitting here with my head on the table for 30 minutes...
dude she got out of bed and definitely took a shit then checked her stomach out in the mirror and whispered "well that probably took off five pounds"
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
I'm at the point where I'm more upset that he got to keep my bottle of Fireball than that he stopped talking to me with no explanation
like I licked Molly off a boys palm last night at a bar I think its ok to eat chicken once a week
It's all fun and games until you rupture a testicle
Well I'm nervous now about the consequences of letting you loose
It's a big decision, I respect that you need to think about it.
My life is just a trash fire of work and Japanese video games now
Randomize
