good luck with ur interview. Just show them your confidence and don't make that sucking snot noise. Really don't. Praying for you, love mom
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
thanks for showing me a good time......and your penis a few times. Thanks especially for that.
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
wanna get hammered and throw tomatoes at the people standing in line for the midnight showing of harry potter and yell whichcraft is evil
You distracted them by dancing on the stripper pole, I ripped the flag off the wall, stuffed it in my pants and we were out.
Makes Sense, i generally dont want the same person two days in a row. Its like what i pick for supper, i like variety
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
The guy behind me is talking about how his life goal is to use his knowledge of mathematics to make the world a better place. My only life goal right now is getting through this lecture without throwing up in my lap.
I got into the shower with my underwear on. I just sat down in the tub and tried to figure out when I lost all control of this hangover.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
I can't decide if this outfit makes me look like a pirate. I also can't decide if I care if it does.
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
I just noticed, at some point last night I got on iTunes and purchased over 100 classical piano songs.
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Randomize
