all you did was keep googling "what time is it" over and over and over
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
he came up my nose again i swear he does this just to piss me off
It's hard to be above the influence when you are the influence.
It's been a long time since I felt this bad on a Monday... and for that, I thank you.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
In Berlin they just cured HIV with stem cells. I am hereby fucking anything that moves.
Beer pong consisted of me throwing a ball at the wall and then falling over because moving my arm made me dizzy. I think our team lost.
No she left bc the of pic I have of my mom in my bathroom. She thought it was my gf
Why the hell do you have a picture of YOUR MOM in your bathroom?!?!
I don't know. I was hiding and the bed was banging. I am going to sleep now in someone's car.
She gave me a can of steel reserve to pour on myself in the shower
I JUST LIKE FLANNEL, NOT VAGINAS! OK?
You’re sleeping on my couch so you’re not making dick appointments tonight
So apparently I’m into choking now
If the amount of time the owner spent looking at my tits is any indication, I’d say I can probably sleep my way to the top
Randomize
