Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
I just had to have my mom look at my penis to figure out what it was. How do you think my day is going?
Fuck that. Livers are so overdramatic and attention hungry.
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Nothing makes my dick softer than hot girls in rain boots.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
yea man just watch out- theres a shitload of broken glass in your bed
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Hey, it was your idea to keep her occupied with the barscanner on your phone.
you didnt need to give her a fucking sharpie. there are handmade barcodes everywhere. including my cock. fucker.
As I read your response saying I need a tan before I can become a go-go dancer, a girl cane up to work and gave me 10 coupons for 100 days of tanning for a dollar.
This is fate. You were destined to be a stripper.
You very well can't change your mind now. It would upset the natural flow of life.
With everyone putting up pictures of their moms on Facebook it's time to go single MILF hunting.
Come help me clean and have sexual intercourse with me
Bring breadsticks
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Randomize
