Where did you get a picture of my penis
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
I just saw a girl licking a cheeseburger wrapper. dont ever let me get that fat
two words...techno handjob
I stayed at the bar and helped clean up cause I was told I'd get free shots. Didn't happen.
We stole a cat. That is all you need to know.
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He called his prostate his "boner button".
Standing in a circle of girls fistpumping to the word "hospital" while taking shots.... I don't see this ending well, but its fucking fun.
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
its 2pm. u awake yet?
ill text u back later. still peeling fingernail polish off my face.
The staples of my diet are Labatt Blue, Xanax, and brick cheese.
I should have never moved out...
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
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