Greg found me on xtube. Who knew random hook ups would leave their web cams on and upload it. At least it shows off big penis.
thank god random hookups don't end with college. happy birthday, america.
i went to throw her on my bed and threw her straight in to my bike
Dude I'm drinking a martini out of a water bottle, I've become my parents.
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
What kind of outfit says I totes want you to take me in the airplane bathroom?
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
I've started day drinking because fuck everyone else
It's Saturday night and I'm getting shitfaced alone while reading Dino porn. Wassssuuuupppp
I feel like we have a good system here turning our sketchy decisions into great stories.
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
I wish I could say this wasn't the first time I shit myself in a Piggly Wiggly.
when I finally sobered up enough to get out of bed this morning I went to talk to mom and forgot that I had TITS written in big letters on both my hands. I love drinking games.
Randomize
