Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
you refused to come out of the bathroom until i asked you in spanish
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
I'm that hungover student in class ... On a wednesday morning
Omg I think I'm in the wrong class
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
I got up before the sun today. That makes me sun for the day.
When did you start smoking in order to be high by 4:30?
It was awkward at first he now knows I fucked his little brother, they were both there. then the tequila kicked in and everything was fine.
HURRY. I NEED DRUNK. MORE DRUNK.
You Just stopped dancing, looked at me and said "I'm gonna make it rain" Then shook the open box of crunch berries everywhere.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
so when he he finally wandered back into the room it was with a pound of cream cheese which he ate in 5 minutes flat and then passed out
Plus i lost a button on my shirt and we got free drinks all night. Sorry I'm not sorry.
Like woke up with a dick piercing kind of drunk.
Randomize
