One of my boys faked an orgasm while fucking a girl tonite, w/ out wearing a condom mind you.
She caught him, and immediately put her clothes on and left.
her vagina probably looks like a grenade went off in a deli
i just cleaned out my toilet because i knew that my head would be in it later
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
Somehow I managed to make my Dunkin Donuts uniform look slutty. And I'm not even wearing hoops.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
Taking back a box of condoms is possibly the most depressing thing i've ever done
story update. I'm locked out of my house. Walk of shame advisory extended...
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
I'm gonna fuck that sweet little pussy of yours into absolute submission
Wow. Sorry. As soon as I sent that I felt inappropriate. But yes. Bring a sandwich after. Lol
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
someone found a bottle of whiskey in the bushes this morning when they were cleaning before an admissions event. i'm 95% sure it's mine..
Randomize