If i off myself, it'll be in a lobster costume in the hot tub with butter...
She's been divorced three times and use to raise cock fighters. Of course I'm interested in her
This would be a good time for the don't get drunk and bang a married chick pep talk...
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
She dresses cool and she's mean. And she has fake boobs I feel like I can relate to her on so many levels.
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
My doctor actually said I was suffering from an "acute hangover" in doctor's note I asked him for....what a douche
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
this is gentle reminder #1 not to forget to bring the vibrator when you come
I left after he drunkenly went into the kitchen and started to make eggs with a shitload of garlic. First time I'd ever had a makeout session interrupted by eggs.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
He deserves a nobel prize for his dick-giving abilities. 10/10, would ride again.
This is Ryan, Kristin's husband. I don't know if you meant to send that pic to me at 3am. You may want to call Kristin. Neat piercing though.
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
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