3:26am: come over
you purposely dodge me and you could have stopped me from leaving, you know how far i live. YOU come over
4:11am: mnlodp
dude I don't understand hebrew and I'm not coming over
But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
At an apparent methhead hillbilly bar and was smiling for a pic when one toothless wonder screamed "look at all them teeth"!
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
The movie was so bad she gave me two blowjobs. Two.
You said "i miss him" not "i miss his dick." You're getting emotionally attatched. Shame.
We were just talking bout putting on helmets and going fo a car ride just to see how ppl react. I will def fit in here haha
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
I'm not having the "why are your fucking my daughter" talk and the "your a drug addict" talk with your mom tonight.
We are finally out of the honeymoon stage of the relationship because it turns out that you can't come back from peeing on me in your sleep.
the problem is i have six tabs of acid in my freezer and no self control
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
I would rather her be sleeping with someone new than getting to go Harry Potter world before me...
Do you know how close I got to throwing him over the edge of the canyon?
I think I'm so comfortable in my sexual relationship because he mostly wants to see me naked with large plates of bacon tastefully placed upon my body
Randomize
