I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
great time with ya sorry i wasn't one of the three guys you wanted to stay with
Dude I think you forgot how to talk last night. We kept asking if you wanted a condom and you just smiled and made weird noises...
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
It's not like I'm never gonna put out again. I'm a sure thing. I promise.
you kept introducing yourself to guys as "never going to happen"
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
He yelled "CARLI LLOYD" and then kicked the cake off the table. Soccer is making monsters out of us.
Guess who has two thumbs and broke her boyfriends dick?
I love everything about him! His penis, his hair, his tattoos, his penis, his cat, his penis.
Scientific fact: if he makes a face like a demonic dog when he's fucking you, makes it easier to fuck without feelings.
What has my life become? I'be officially recruited my fuck buddy for help getting my ex back.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
Randomize
