But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
Handle of 100 proof captain dressed like a pilgrim here we go
No more tipping the bathroom attendant with your phone.
He just kept pointing to each of us saying "arrested, arrested, arrested"
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
So my nipple piercings were only $20 because it's breast cancer awareness month. Fuck yes!
She just mixed her Emergen-C with champagne... Vegas here we come!
They just broke the window so they could get in and smoke the taxi driver out...
This country song on the radio just had a rap break. What. No. Why.
Where is Holly?
Nevermind. i can hear her having sex two doors down
Grandma is high again and locked herself in the house
the yoga instructor with the "dirt" and "roots" tattoos is seriously mother nature. i get my period after ever session i have with her. i'm trippin' balls over it.
Randomize
