There was a ginger baby in the car next to me. I almost totaled my car into the center divide.
I tried to assassinate the ginger baby
just woke up. wallet empty. bottle empty. tattoo in pen on my arm. smell like bad sex. woke up alone. and wall-e is playing on my computer. need answers.
I found out 2day that my dad was a stripper in New Oleans.
I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
You closed the sidewalk off to pedestrians last night. With a glitter covered safety cone
he's a bartender at a gay strip club. maybe he can work his magic. with getting u in, not gay magic.
I knew she was going to get knocked up just by looking at her facebook pics
Yo I tried to get u stoned for ur dreams by blowing weed smoke in ur face while u slept. Ur welcome.
I did shrooms last night. My drug checklist is complete, I can finally graduate.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I swear to god....if you can give yourself a brazilian you can take a fucking bullet
I lost a bet last night, now I have to name the baby Fetty Wap, regardless of gender. Riley is going to kill me.
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
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