My eyes are so dilated i literally have night vision right now.
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
we gave some random guy a shot for shoveling our sidewalk.
4 feet of snow. teaching the cats how to snow swim. throwing them off the porch and seeing what happens.
he walked down the highway for 3 miles at 4 am, and got me coffee on the way. i dont think a blow job would have been enough.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I feel like a color. Like a wavy color
especially when i'm drunk. his dick might as well be made of cotton candy.
Yeah man, you were grinding with his wife, I wouldn't be worried about it
Speaking of lightening speed, he ate me out while I was watching The Flash. If that's not winning at life idk what is
So I don't think the seahorse breeding thing is gonna work.
That was random, even for you Mom.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Ladies night is a gift from god. If it weren't for that, I'd probably be selling my eggs for booze money.
I have only been here for a week and might contributed to a dumpster fire on accident.
Randomize
