I just know... :) goodntight
Whoops, meant "goodnight", but the other is true too.
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
Who's your beautiful friend? Please include the words "Straight", "Single", and "Legal" in your response.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
it feels good to walk into a CVS and not go straight to the pharmacy counter for plan b. its been a while....
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
You were outside cuddling a rock singing Bohemian Rhapsody.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
fuck you and your stupid hot as hell face
I just did the walk of shame in monkey slippers in the snow
Teach me the song of your people
I have not brushed my hair. I'm wearing a yoga hoodie. I look like I slept in a gutter somewhere. Today is going to be a good day.
Crust to egg proportion prescribes to a pedantic form of quiche. It's like saying breakfast pizza isn't pizza at all.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Yeah. We had phone sex then cried together, it was beautiful and heartbreaking
Randomize
