is it cool if i come over and use your computer?
what happened to yours?
i got a little to drunk last night and threw up on it...then i tried to wash it off under the sink.
girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
Look you found him on craigslist. You should be happy that he at least HAS a normal looking dick.
She gained 35 lbs and has an ankle bracelet, time for new booty call.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I dont think that yelling at the medic "Christmas is gone, fuck off santa" was the best idea when you couldnt feel your legs.
I wish someone would just come knock on my door and fuck me already so that me and my stuffed animals aren't the only ones who see my amazing spring break tan. I'm not getting skin cancer so I can just sit here abstinent.
Full contact beer pong was definitely not my best idea.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
According to my snapchat story, I tore a fake wig off a security guard and ran away with it.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Ugh im hungover from last night, and to top it all off, I think someone jacked my laptop.
umm ya, so we found it in the oven wrapped in a pillow case this morning
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