The reason i havent seen you yet better have huge tits
So the dentist told me I couldn't suck on anything. She emphasized ANYthing.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
E drugging s springing. Ease dnt Kate. To t e. ess e I meant thou.
the parade is in 5 days. put your big boy pants on and come to beer training. time to build your tolerance. i can't have you passing out in a bush with a cape on again this year.
he said he needs a little more pabst, some time to jack off and a sandwich and he'll be ready
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
Before I go in, is 'I just got a root canal 2 hours ago' a good excuse to show up drunk to yoga class with a 6 pack? Because if not I think I need to go home.
You have not lived until you've had your brains fucked out on a broken down Tunnel of Love ride. Life is good.
You just accidentally called me. You kept saying "Really?! Really?!!" So I can only assume you are having sub par sex
How does one acquire holy water?
After you punched me you ran away and it took an hour to find you... On the wrong floor... Sitting alone saying "it doesnt make sense"
YOU CANT JUST BLOW GUYS BC THEY’RE NICE TO YOU LEXI
I CAN IF I WANT TO
I believe the only reason I am slightly functional right now is the leftover drugs in my nose that I keep sniffing
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