Molly wanted me to tell you, "she hasnt shit on the floor in a while" like she thinks its an accomplishment.
I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
apparently he couldn't remember my name so he refereed to me as whats-her-boobs and everyone knew that it was me he was talking about
She either was great at sex or I finished the whole bottle of svedka my self
i wasn't about to bring her gummy handcuffs to her father's funeral
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
What'd I miss?
Erotic hypnosis and studded dog collars.
All I can remember from last night was eating nutella and touching myself to Weird Science.
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
Randomize
