So the bouncer told me I could leave the easy way or the hard way. I told him I was going to make him earn his 10 bucks that hour.
Apparently you chose the latter.
State Street has never looked so beautiful than during my walk of shame.
I wore my underwear in the shower just in case i passed out and you had to come in and get me
This titty bar has wifi. I just did FaceTime stage side
You had me sold at "fucking you down the slide"
I don't think my prof knows we've noticed her No Bra Fridays.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
He asked me where I wanted it. I told him in the condom. He stops mid thrust and says "you're no fun" and then blew. Chivalry is semi dead.
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
I was wearing the shirt my little sister got for her birthday when the condom broke. I finally have it back to her and told her it was bad luck
I spent $31 at mcdonalds last night. Threw my nuggets all over the yard, ate them out of the snow, picked a fight about it, vomited, then passed out.
Naked.
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
you walked 30 min all the way back to the dorms at 2am?
i was more bummed that i dropped all my skittles.
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
Do you remember punching the light out in the bathroom? I didn't, and that was at bar 2 of 4…
Randomize
