Yea, forget your mom. She will be home after her one night stand.
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
New Low: Just set a reminder on my phone for me to check on things I need to harvest late on Farmville.
It's like she bought one bad life decision and got one free
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
Your therapist is not going to think that you using your vagina as revenge is okay
I've already started drinking so the earlier you get out of class the more coherent I'll probably be.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
drunk brunch me or lose me forever
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
No I kepy moaning and just called out a name to make them believe I was actually having sex instead of masturbating.
I'm glad you still love me even when I change pants in the kitchen and demand you spoon me
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Drunk me bought a cell phone last week and began texting sober me. The conversation between the two is still on going.
Randomize
