Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
I caught myself masturbating while watching a baseball game today. It was over before I realized what was going on. And then I was just confused.
I had to puke in a pizza box on the drive home. People saw.
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
I am too drunk to make real decisions. I had pop rocks all over my ass earlier. This is not a joke.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
You were basically naked. Just covered in pink duck tape and feathers. I'd have to say this is beyond the slutty mark..
She gave me a handjob at the dinner table while her dad was carving the turkey. I made eye contact with him. Im pretty sure he knew.
I came back and almost ran over two people passed out in my driveway I've never met before in my life
My goal this weekend is to get a number that goes with the penis I take him.
Aspirations
I last recall trying to play piano and asking justin for drugs. I would like to think I then gracefully laid down on the couch and shut my eyes like a sleeping kitten.
I'm somewhere between crying and wanting to orgasm.
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Randomize