you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
A chick at the bar last night took my black berry, looked at my Brick Breaker score and told me she couldnt take someone that has a lower score than her seriously.
No I'm not okay I had a crush on the singer of Tokio Hotel for four months and now you tell me he's a dude?
he had a blacklight sublime poster, of course i had to do him.
the arrest was probably divine intervention, cause i think we were heading to an ill-advised threesome.
Depending upon how the Sox game progresses, I'll either cry on the bar or fuck someone tonight...
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
Your roommate from freshman year just had a baby. I think you're winning. Hooray for fifth year seniors!
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
I had a dream that I got you so wet that you flooded my apartment
i think the people from taco bell are onto us. they had my order ready today at 3am BEFORE I even got there.
he was Irish, I had to have sex with him.
You think the guy at the speed wash knows he needs to scrub the vomit off the side of my car?
He knew.
What were you even doing out there at 2 a.m.?
Look, i had a gallon of lemonade, a pack of smokes and a Darth Vader voice changer. What did you EXPECT me to do?
Randomize
