So apparently I told him I was off to go "whore skipping" and I disappeared into the night skipping down the street. I know this because there's video.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
but his dog just died...ill send him an edible arrangement or a 6 pack or something
I guess I gave him a 20 minute play-by-play of the first three sections of R. Kelly's 'trapped in a closet.'
I tried really hard to get you laid last night. And by that I mean I asked a bunch of dudes if they were top or bottom.
We eventually had to ration the melon vodka. 10 pushups per shot. THATS why my arms hurt
Mystery lines found in a Pyrex dish in the back of my pantry at 415 am. No recall as to it's origin. Unidentifiable taste. Obviously I'm doing them
We told our cab driver we'd give him 3 grand if he pit maneuvered you guys in your cab.
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
I did too many shots and now a kitten is trying to eat my bagel.
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
So what do normal people wear to parties? Normal meaning not you.
You wear an inflatable farm animal to TWO THEMED PARTIES and I never get to hear the end of it...
she dared me to make out with the amish dude so I went up to him and grabbed him by the beard
GRABBED HIM BY THE BEARD
I was gonna turn him down, but he correctly identified a song from Pocahontas.
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Randomize
