I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
I just found your credit card inside the bag of chips
I am full of burrito and curiosity
I like how washing the beer bong is now a regular part of washing the dishes.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
It went alright, nothing too special, just got threatened with a knife by our server.
Call me old fashioned but i like to drunk dial a girl 2 or 3 times before sending a dick pic
And now thanks to shrooms we all got a terrifying glimpse of what goes on in his head. I will not say I didn't see it coming when it turns out he made a suit out of people's skin
pooping with feet up on an ottoman about level with the toilet is nice
I am debating about my sub. I am not quite sure I can be the dom he needs.
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
you and him went to the park at 2am to "catch a pigeon" and ACTUALLY CAME BACK WITH A PIGEON
I wouldn't know what to do. You never really mentally prepare for a cactus getting thrown at your face.
Over Bumbled last night. I think I set my dog up on a date Sunday afternoon. I have to drive him, meet the other dog’s dad and secretly drink a bottle of champagne from a “water bottle”. This is not what I expected 30 to be like.
Randomize
