my friend just told me "I dunno what u r doing but keep doing it cuz it makes u look fabulous"
LOL that's cool. Guess u r gonna have to keep doing me
i woke up with "only hugh can prevent florist friars" written up my arm ... i need to know what we did last night
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Almost screamed "GO FISH MOTHER FUCKER" at the girl I nanny today. Drunken card games shouldn't bleed into my sober life.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
I'm just a little concerned for your well being... and your penis too I suppose.
The guy that stalks me just looked out his window and saw me in his neighbor's hot tub. Get your shit ready the fraternity wars are starting.
You're a goddess. Probably of destruction and dick jokes, or some shit, but man, lesser bitches wish they could be half as fab.
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
Randomize
