There's a dildo in the cheerios box here...
He kept starring at my ass and repeating "Its Just a beautiful piece of artwork."
I like one night stands...theyre like crushes for big kids
It was great. Even bought me breakfast in the AM
From?
Well, he didn't exactly take me out, but left a $20 on the table...
next time a party gets busted lets get a group photo first.
I knew I was high when I wanted to write a poem about how great it felt to wash my face
Hey they cleaned all the blood out of the elevator. Also could you pick up some nachos?
dude, I convinced you I was your conscience for like 15 minutes last night. you weren't just "a little high"
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
Threw up in hyvee parking lot. Thanksgiving shopping complete.
He finger blasted me like an angel dude
I'm currently trying to figure out a way to fill the bathtub up with mashed potatoes so when he comes over he'll know what's about to hit him..
It shouldn't be this hard to find someone who you haven't blown.
I mean, if I asked you, would you cum on cotton candy for me?
I think a major source of concern would be the fact you snorted a shot. Who does that?
Randomize
