none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
hey its robert, we just made out in the backyeard. i'm inside now and you should come to the bathroom and meet me.
the whole time he was cumming, he did the joey lawrence WHOA. over and over. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA. WHOA.
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
We've only been driving for two hours and I'm already down 3 vicodin...I'm not going to survive this family vacation.
Just bought a disco ball for 5 dollars, of course we're drinking tonight.
Just had a pleasant conversation with a mugger while he was taking off my shoes. Why can't I get along with people like this sober?
Forgot to mention there might be a picture of me being thrown in the air while at a Mexican restaurant
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
And then somehow we were arguing over how to fold our arms
I don't think of it as I'm taking a pole dancing class...its more like I'm making myself recession proof
His thanks his mom for not having an abortion at his wedding toast. I love frat weddings.
Now I'm at the gym and I never want to leave. It's a combo of adderall and endorphins and I don't want it to go away
YOU ARE SO GOD DAMN LOUD AND YOU'RE SHAKING THE GOD DAMN HOUSE. FUCKING STOP.
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
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