yours is so small it looks like an acorn!!
handjob tips. give me some.
You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I just want to apologize for screaming when I saw you the other day. It's just that you looked really gross and I was high.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Well still if someone cared enough about u to wish an unwanted child or a disease on u ..u must have been doing something right
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
So I bring Danny back to the apartment for the first time and my roommate is curled up in the beanbag in the middle of the floor, wearing nothing but her uggs, high out of her mind and watching Harry potter... She offered us kettle corn.
He asked if he could come over tomorrow....
Due to last night I think a roommate constitution should be made. The first law will be designed to prevent any chicks below a 4 to enter the house.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
its a recording of you guys having sex?!
its actually 30 minutes of him begging and then 2 minutes of sex.
Randomize
