Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
We need to talk about our relationship.
I just won a bet involving 10 tequila shots. You've got about 3 minutes
Just to save you guys the surprise, somebody shit outside of our door.
There is a girl on the metro with no shoes and she's using a Crown Royal bag as a purse.
you know who we are? We're the female white stoner version of Kenan and Kel.
I remember just enough about last night to wish I didn't remember anything.
A man that refers to my vagina in third person is a man after my own heart.
You ruined me. I can't stop referring to everything outside as the "no-walls" ever since you showed me that video while I was tripping balls. My speech may be permanently altered for the rest of earth spins
This was like angel cum on the bread of life filled with the nectar of the gods
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Operation terrify all men while simultaneously make them fall in love with me is going quite swimmingly so far
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
WE JUST PASSED A FUCKING SPACE SHIP! NOT JOKING! A REAL FUCKING SPACE SHIP! THIS IS NOT THE DRUGS! SPACE! SHIP!
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
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