grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
this is amy. the small petlike person from the womens bathroom at the reef.
those girls across the street saw me hanging my towel off of my penis...they're coming over later
like literally i think i'm sweating out semen right now
Googled "can you put dry ice in your drink?" I'm safee
Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
I asked you if you were ok and you said "dude I'm fine, I'm in the recovery position"
You just threw your burrito at the passing teenage couple and yelled "It's never gonna last" of course your were a shit show
i refuse to be around anyone not wearing a sombrero...its cinco de mayo
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
If by "Are you high?" u mean "Did you just pass out at Genghis Grill walking to your table and falceplant?" the answer is yes.
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
The angle I tried to shoot a load on her face was unfortunate. I accidentally came on the David Bowie tribute she had out. Oddly, that made it more erotic.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
Randomize
