I'm almost 25, which means I can ride with girls that have permits
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
i really wish i had a remote for my computer. its all the way on my bed while im across the hall puking my brains out to enya. not cool.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
Either this is the best sandwich I've ever had, or my stomach is just relieved to have something in it that's not Red Bull or semen.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Believe it or not, Travis and I simultaneously breaking beer bottles over eachothers heads was not a good idea.
well in the interest of full disclosure I have been using a used kfc spork as a buttscratcher for a month
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
Is it bad form to spend company money and place an ad in the paper because I wanna nail the sales girl?
I have in my possession one ukulele shaped package.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
Randomize
